Thoughts on Mediation and “On Apology”, Part III

Tiger Woods’ recent mea culpa led to a number of comments and critiques. One of the most interesting analyses came in a New York Times article on Sunday, “I Apologize. No, Really, I’m Serious, I…” by Paul Vitello.  In it, he notes the work of  Dr. Aaron Lazare, the author of “On Apology”, which focuses on personal, not public apologies, but has some real wisdom to share for both types of apologies.

Mr. Vitello quotes Dr. Lazare on four basic points. The third, according to Dr. Lazare, is that you must ask the offended person for forgiveness.  Dr. Lazare stresses that this request is necessary — but not sufficient (more on that next time.)  What might that mean in the context of the Connecticut mediation and consulting work that Dovetail Resolutions does?

In business mediation, it might mean, will give me another chance to do things the right way?  In mediation of a family wealth conflict, it might mean, will you let me make things square and heal the family rift? In elder mediation, it might mean, will you forgive me for taking for granted all that you do for our family and Mom?


Posted in Basics of Mediation and Conflict, Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010

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